OLD BOY ENTERTAINMENT

It's that ninja Juve from the Magnolia...

2005-12-16T20:29:00.000Z

Juve
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Nice guy with a great line in cooking tips but horrendous taste in DVDs - Bad News Bears and other assorted terrible comedies? Is that really what they're quoting and re-enacting up in the 'Nolia?

Sensitive Spuds...

2005-12-12T23:52:00.000Z

A time for giving...

2005-12-11T15:53:00.000Z

The Old Boy xmas party was quite literally a feast of festive present giving.

The opening display of gifts certainly looked grand:

Frenzied present opening soon revealed the contents to include:

The worst quality Young Jeezy t-shirt ever
A Chingo Bling colouring and activity book
A giant tin of Quality Street
An 'I Heart Jesus' lanyard (hidden inside said tin of confectionary)

A vintage 'Darling, You Shouldn't Have Gone To So Much Trouble' cook book
A WWE female wrestling DVD
An 'Irish Hip-Hop Man Of The Year 1982' t-shirt

A Spice 1 CD
A Frank southern rap special pocket magazine featuring a fine array of Caddys, tats and fishing advice
A potato

The consensus seemed to be that Cakeboy, recieving both something to wear and something to eat, certainly lucked out in the present stakes. And my, he certainly looks happy here:

(Artist's impression. Actual Cakeboy might more arable.)

Gifted Limited

2005-12-08T17:43:00.000Z

xmastree
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Less than 24 hours to go before the Old Boy's secret santa present swapping session jumps off. Who'll get the present held together by elastic bands because the sellotape ran out? Oooh, the suspense!

And the venue for all this festive frivolity? The Goose, of course. But we don't just lease the function room - we buy the whole venue. For the day. Or something.

(Xmas tree courtesy of the Van Pelt family.)

Boss Hawg

2005-12-07T18:28:00.000Z

The latest issue of The New Yorker is one of those subtle ones that you flick through at first thinking that nothing much catches the eye only to then get drawn into a 14 page article on wild hogs.

For those that have been sleeping, these beasts - which are rumoured to reach a length of ten foot and a weight of 1000 pounds - are pretty much rampaging across the US, having gone from being found in a limited number of states to being present in the majority of them. (Their expansion is in part down to human hunters live-trapping them and then exporting them back to their own grounds to hunt at their leisure.) The feral hogs are pretty much more resilient than roaches: they eat ey'thing from snakes to dogs, can swim two miles in the ocean and have survived hurricanes. There's also some corollary between a state having wild hogs in it and its likelihood of supporting Bush. Truly, the pigs go deep.

Then you end up skipping onto an article about chess machines and how they're now 'thinking' in creative ways that their programmers never intended them to work in. So, when the world's taken over by giant wild hogs being masterminded by huge chess machines and the whole thing resembles a pig-friendly version of Planet Of The Apes it'll all be our own fault.

Oh, the horror!

Warm It Up

2005-12-05T16:57:00.000Z

picture
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Don't care what any grinch says - smoothies with knitted bobble hats on are so festive.

Yawnsome Cowboy

2005-11-30T21:59:00.000Z

Some more lame fabricated beef here.

To wit, once upon a time a few month's ago during that week when it was really really rainy in New York I interviewed Rhymefest. During the inteview he started to do that thing he does during interview of breaking into one of his raps. After which he started to explain his words by way of example and brought up the UK crew SAS and proceeded to somewhat dis them. I let him ramble on about them and, having little interest in reporting on a beef so bemusingly matched, carried on with the interview, again never mentioning either of the SAS bods but instead talking about stuff like the time he worked in a flower shop.

Come the time to write it up, the article was submitted with a series of box-outs - small quotes outside of the main article consisting of generally short and snappy comments - including his views on SAS. The number of box-outs run next to an article largely depends on the whim of the designer laying the pages out and, as it happens, this time the SAS one ran.

Now Mr 'Fest has decided to dispute his very own words (words which are still recorded on tape - well, that iPod voice recorder thingy anyway) on the AllHipHop website. Yawn.

What really annoys about the whole thing, beyond the entire made-up nature of it all, is the insulting inference that I would ask him - or any rapper - such a lame question as what groups from a country they don't live in they like. It's just a really, really crap question and one that I've never asked. (I do, however, always make a note to ask superstar rappers what their favourite colour is - that's cool.) When you reach the veritable heights of spending 20 minutes talking to Killer Mike about why he's driving around with a load of catfish in his car with apparently nowhere to go you really don't want to fall back on such uninspired tat as, 'So, which UK rappers do you like?'

So, um, yeah, don't believe the fake beef shite.

Sarah Silverman still rocks though. PM

(As an aside, it's also highly annoying that if you are going to end up dragged into some form of charcoaled, broiled or foiled 'beef' with a rapper then it should at least be for something vaguely interesting, like the time I wanted to get an autism specialist to analyse Kanye West's interview behaviour and see if he checked all the right boxes to be declared as one of the special children. Oh well.)

"Get an ass-whoopin' like Rodney King got..."

2005-11-27T01:09:00.000Z

While Aaron McGruder's animated version of The Boondocks comic strip seems to have passed up the opportunity to bring edgy hip-hop generation humour to the masses, preferring instead to try and shock based on the singular idea of cartoon characters saying the n-word, Sarah Silverman -, a white, thin, Jewish girl - has managed to tap into rap's 'everything's fair game' make-up superbly.

Her Jesus Is Magic film/stand-up routine contains her flipping the script on everything from the holocaust ("Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ. And then the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I'm one of the few people who believe it was the blacks.") to telling an ex-boyfriend defined as "half-white" that "He would have made a really expensive slave in olden times." Not to mention a 9/11 joke co-starring American Airlines that shouldn't work but, perhaps due to her deliberately conceited delivery, does.

At times she's a little juvenile in her shock antics, but the mainstream hasn't seen such hip-hop au fait comic sensibility since Curb's Larry and Krayzee Eyez Killa exchanges.

A Great Day In Hotlanta

2005-11-26T16:34:00.000Z

Congratulations on the old boys behind the southern re-creating of Art Kane's A Great Day In Harlem photo, not so much for showing unity in the hip-hop scene blah blah blah but just for actually getting over 50 rap types - count 'em - in one place at the same time on time. Full roll call here.

Santana's Giving

2005-11-25T05:38:00.000Z

In 2005 we shouldn't really be surprised at seeing rappers cavorting around in all sorts of previously unlikely mainstream places, but peeping Juelz Santana round-up Thanksgiving in the US by performing to a studio audience of uniformed-up military men and gals was certainly, um, different.

Not to hate but...

2005-11-18T21:27:00.000Z

...Today's 'Get Rich Or Die Tryin'' screening was kinda, um, random. And doody.

Starting off with a speech in which Jimmy Iovine told the room how, once upon a time 15 years ago, Interscope invented hip-hop (along with helpfully educating the masses on such vague and unheralded concepts such as, um, 'America'), some old Oirish guy who wrote the script then equated the real life Fif's plight with that of an Irish political group fighting for an amendment to a bill of rights when the bill of rights didn't even exist in the first place (don't worry, the exciting bit where Fif' sells crack and shoots people will come soon; the satisfying completion of his analogy doesn't).

Then the film started with an excellent intro (screen shaking to the thump of the bass) before it all became a bit, well, passe. The plot seems a little confused at times, not sure whether to be an exact account of Curtis Jackson's (or, rather, Marcus's) life story, a flat-out slick HBO style gangsta show (the action scenes play out with slick execution and in your face violence), or a look at the salvation role of rap in the main character's life. He also appears to pretty much be shot in the head after five minutes, only for you to then find out that it was only his cheek that got hit in shades of popular 80s soap characters waking up to find out that it was all a dream.

It's also riddled with a ton of hip-hop culture chronological inaccuracies (the namechecking in rap of groups that weren't even formed by the time of the scene; completely messed up gig and album poster background paraphrenalia, again missing the time of the scene by batches of years; sneakers not out at the time the scene's set; clothing brands out of sync with the era's depicted). Which is just kinda really lame and the stuff you'd expect from an outsider team attemping to 'do' hip-hop, not a line-up that lived through it all.

The peculiar thing is that, mass appeal by the G-Unit-branded seaside bucket that Fif' has, you suspect that the kids won't be able to make it a box-office smash due to the film's age rating, while hip-hop heads will just sit there shaking their heads at the stream of things that really really irk to the point of making the whole thing reak with a sense of the disbelieving.

DVD with extras will sell billions of millions though.

After the screening the Old Boys then went to Muji and attempted to re-up their dress game into something altogether more grown and sexy, including woolen neck-warmers, 'classic' jackets, grey v-necks and scarfs that, alas, were apparently not thick enough or had too many tassles on them. They then went to Tower and read Murder Dog and a fascinating old school wrestling magazine while taking turns to listen to that great new Juelz Santana song that samples the 'Hey Mr Postman' track.

It's a hard shop life.

Reasons To Love Rap: Number Two

2005-11-15T17:48:00.000Z

The very existence of a record called 'Time To Throw A Chair'. Not 'Throw A Chair' or 'Time To Throw' but 'Time To Throw A Chair'. So specific.

Um...

2005-11-11T19:24:00.000Z

Always nice to see another trainer with a silly motif. Young 'Snowman' Jeezy gets a signature Adidas Superstar...

'Yeaaaaahhh!'

Or maybe just, 'No'.

20/07/71 - 16/11/00

2005-11-08T16:36:00.000Z

Months back the good old boys over at Murda Funk sent over a batch of mix-CDs. But, as when happens when you get too much of something, the pile looked too daunting to check out properly. Come today's seventh hourly repeat of Sky Sports News though, one of them was popped on. And? Their 'RIP DJ Screw Tribute Mix' is blinding stuff, all soulful in its slurring yet still keeping a funky to the bone bottom edge. Highlights? Master P rocking well on 'I Feel Like', Big Moe's 'City Of Syrup' and Lil' Flip's 'So Real'.

Check out their warped European musings over at the Record Company Records shack.

"Yo! Rednecks, coloureds, Asians, Africans, Ethiopians; Whatever you is... Lil' Flip is back as Fliperraci..."

2005-11-01T19:26:00.000Z

This time round ex-Cash Money in-house board-honcho Mannie Fresh assists on production credits. 'Freshly Snipes', as Byron Thomas now wishes to be known, adds recogisable haunting synth horns and an addictive touch to the first track to be taken from Flip's next album, 'I Need Mine', dew to drop (sorry) December 6th.

Allegedly, young Flippa "Owns ten watches but [he's] never on time". The youth, eh?

Reason Why There Won't Be A Secret Crump Gig In London

2005-11-01T17:53:00.000Z

"He's gone to Germany for a big TV..."

The mind doth boggle.

Who's Going To Step Up?

2005-10-30T13:46:00.000Z

Lil Wayne up front on XXL certainly looks mighty healthy, and those southern boys inside is to be welcomed, but you can't help feeling we're waiting on that next classic LP to elevate things once more. It's great to see the sales, the attention and the rest, but New York rested on its laurels one too many times and then suffered the fate of the hand dealt by the other regions.

With Outkast coming back for a final hurrah in December, it's unlikely that they're going to step back to the days of 'Southernplayalistic...' and Purple Ribbon's finest, Killer Mike, has just waited too damn long now!

Rap A Lot consistently do their thing, but last year seemed to be their year for classics from Devin and Z-Ro. The old vets can't hold it down for ever - but who would bank against Scarface pulling it out of the bag once more? It's not happening anytime soon though.

TI stepped up, but 'Trap Musik' still felt more natural. Banner openly admits his agenda has changed. Paul Wall and Mike Jones are doing their thing, but are unlikely to emerge as leaders. Bun B is solid as ever - but it's too diverse to rival 'Ridin' Dirty'.

Luda is in his club rocking comfort zone and Lil Jon is now in re-up mode - inevitable after such domination. Then Lil Wayne saying that the Mannie beats have been removed from his LP doesn't bode well, as Weezy F Baby's talent deserves a classic.

The most likely to succeed remains Young Jeezy and the movement he's driven all year. Jay-Z believes and 'Let's Get It' has hood standard status locked down.

It's on them right now, and pressure comes with success, but who's going to step up?

A David Banner Interview

2005-10-28T20:18:00.000+01:00

So who actually produced 'Bout Our Money'?

[Smiles mischievously] "Me."

Somewhat longer interview coming soon.

"Here's a list of emcees that'll kill you in eight bars...

2005-10-28T00:26:00.001+01:00

50, um, Jay-Z and Nas."

If tonight's Powerhouse jam goes down as rumoured then Old Boys will be split between Fif' and Jigga. Whatever happens, it'll be highly entertaining rap fare, and just as much as you don't want to forget how vicious 50 was in his mixtape days, you also don't want to overlook how much of a "vindictive lady"* Jigga man can be.

(* Characterisation courtesy of someone very close to the camp we aint' gonna name!)

"Did you know that Cyber Sapp, who did 'Hey Cake Boy', also produced 'We Ride Them Caddies' and that Domo is also the..."

2005-10-27T22:16:00.000+01:00

Tomorrow Old Boys will be scaring the mentalist wits out of Lavell 'DB' Crump by turning up to parlay with him in 'Whut It Dew' and crooked letter state t-shirts while packing a pile of records to sign he probably doesn't even remember (Native's storming 'Put It Down' anyone?). On-site interivew coming soon. In the meantime go back and re-bump 'Mississippi: The Album' - pure five mic business.

Dance... Ya Know It?

2005-10-27T11:50:00.000+01:00

Westwood turning down Strictly Come Dancing? Probably good to see integrity still exists. But man, we're all secretly wishing it didn't!

Miracle 'Bounce'

2005-10-27T11:44:00.000+01:00

"Georgia boys/Real McCoys/Miracle with Pastor Troy..."

A fine 1999 vintage. There's just something about strained and gravelly voiced rappers from ATL that works so well.

Lavell's Out

2005-10-26T17:22:00.000+01:00

So Banner's chance to put on a gig in London (largely for the benefit of, um, about five people) has been scuppered due to some grime oiks getting the gig cancelled by the Met. Oh well, guess Old Boys will have to trek down to boogie down Bristol in their Whut It Dew and Mississippi shirts to shout along to every word and then jet before Kano's probably even arrived at the venue.

Sho' Is Fun

2005-10-25T10:21:00.000+01:00

Meet Merv. Here he's rocking his finest purple finery while pimpin' the strip at Times Square. And while Merv rocks the crushed velvet on the regular, yesterday he was joined by a motley array of wannabe pimp pups to celebrate the First Annual Dog Day Masquerade. Bones got thowed.

Read These Nikes

2005-10-25T10:14:00.000+01:00

It's tricky to start making people contemplate not liking Run-DMC but last night's Adidas party (for, um, something or other) came close, lowlight being the bastardised Run-DMC logos spelling out things like 'Broken Jazz' (playboy please...).

So, make that a round of Air Force 1s all round then.

On The Mic

2005-10-24T14:33:00.000+01:00

Pictures from the third Hip-Hop Karaoke London night are now up here.

Also, hit up the New York Hip-Hop Karaoke blog to download that shit is bananas Rhymefest and ODB 'Build Me Up Buttercup' track.

Things that suck about living in London: No.1

2005-10-23T15:01:00.000+01:00

Not being able to attend the Trick Luv Da Kids Spooktacular Halloween Fundraiser later this month down in Will Smith's Miami.

Caption Competition Time!

2005-10-21T15:28:00.000+01:00

DSC00149
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Power Summit

2005-10-21T15:26:00.000+01:00

DSC00148
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Deep like the mind of Esteban

2005-10-21T15:18:00.000+01:00

DSC00145
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

65 Days To Go...

2005-10-21T14:19:00.000+01:00

A Chingo Bling Xmas

What's been your most memorable Xmas?

"One year my parents didn't have a lot of money to get me gifts but my brother-in-law came through with a big ol' bag. I know he probably spent his whole check on me that year!"

What would be your ideal Xmas?

"Chilling with family, nephews and nieces putting on talent shows, lots of food, snow in H-Town, and giving toys and food to the needy - like Chingo Bling tamales, colouring books and bobbleheads."

What's the best Xmas present you've ever received?

"My nephew Eric was born right around Xmas - that was a good gift that year. He's crazy like his tio [uncle]!"

What's the best Xmas song?

"'Chingo Bells' by me! And 'Christmas In Hollis' by Run-DMC. Oh, and I almost forgot - 'Grandma Got Ranned Over By A Reindeer' (Chopped & Screwed)!"

What's on Chingo Bling's Xmas dinner menu?

"Tamales of course! Por favor believe it!"

Buying That For A Dollar

2005-10-17T18:08:00.000+01:00

Just when you've vowed to stop buying so many records in New York (balancing up the cheapness of them versus the damn weight carting them back), you stumble across a random flea market and pick up a batch of one dollar southern tunes, including:

Bubba Sparxxx feat. Petey Pablo 'The Otherside'
Between this and Killer Mike's 'My Chrome' you'd deduce that someone at Purple Ribbon has a bit of an 80s jones.

Lil' Flip 'You'ze A Trick'
Electro cha-cha in the house!

Three 6 Mafia feat. Slim Thug, Trick Daddy & Project Pat 'Stay Fly' (Remix)
The most disco that Slim Thugga has ever sounded.

David Banner feat. Lil Jon & Jadakiss 'Treat Me Like'
Terrible mish-mash of an album track but comes packing 'Bout Our Money' tacked on to the end of the b-side!

Alfamega feat. Ti, Slim Thug & Trina 'Southern Boyz'
The 'Extra Clean' versions comes with the safety warning "No hoes". Helpful and politically correct!

Tow Down feat. Mike Jones & Triple 'Show Your Tattoos'
Still sealed and will probably stay that way but from the title alone it's bound to be brilliant.

There was also a fully-functioning Fonzie pinball machine for only $75. So tempting...

'Get Rich Or Die Gloatin''

2005-10-13T17:14:00.000+01:00

The new Whoo Kid co-sign 'Back To Business' goes a little something like this...

1. Orders to shoot anyone who looks at Mase the wrong way.

2. Disbelief that no-one is going to shoot him.

3. Taunting of Lebron - telling him to renegotiate his deal (a sneaky Jigga diss after the recent XXL cover?)

4. Rants about his dislike for 'old school niggas'

5. Prodigy offering line after line of hero-worship for his boss (and the most homo-erotic line yet in rap).

6. It goes on and on...

The G-Unit general is clearly up for a bit of trouble once again.

APPEAL

2005-10-07T16:17:00.000+01:00

As per the email sent out:

Dear GWEB members; a mailout that's slightly out of the ordinary; below is a message regarding UK hiphop personality DJ Swing. Please read carefully, and think if you can help in any way. For non-UK subs; do you have family in U.K who could help? Thanks.

You may be aware of the situation facing Dj Swing, ex member of The Boogie Bunch. He has leukemia, & there was a tv documentary in the U.K about the search for a bone marrow donor who matches 100%. Unfortuntaly, so far, there hasnt been a match.

DJ SWING has 12 days from TODAY to find a donor, or the op to save his life cannot happen.

We know there have been many emails about Swing's plight, and those in the London area may hear a new radio ad from his friends appealing for people to have a blood test in the search for that elusive match.

Anyone in the UK can go into a hospital and ask to give a blood test, and tell the doctor they need the results relating to bone marrow to be put on the national database urgently. Phone hospital first to ensure they do it-some don't
Swing's doctors are checking the database daily, so nothing will be missed. If there's a match, theyll see it, and they can get in touch via the hospital where the blood test happened.

This is the last chance for someone who not only gave a lot to UK hiphop, but who is universally acknowledged to be a really good guy.

Please put the word around, if you have a newsletter, site forum, ANYTHING of the sort; then please spread the word.
12 days folks...

Thankyou
URBANELITE PROMOTIONS

Please email: urbanelite@talk21.com for more info.

Flowers

2005-10-05T11:20:00.000+01:00

'Featuring ODB' is now nothing more than a red light to avoid the track in question, but Rhymefest's 'Build Me Up' bucks the rule.

Sounding a little like that track on Q-Tip's unreleased album where he was singing about going down to Mexico and checking out girls in boots or something, Ason Unique croons his way through the chorus to 'Build Me Up Buttercup' while Kanye's theologically-inclined ghost-writer of choice drops gems. Surprisingly dope.

Reasons Why You Can't Dig Rap Without Having A Sense Of Humour: Part One

2005-10-03T20:19:00.000+01:00

There's a bloke in the ATL who Sony are just starting to promote called Big Floaty who's featured on a track called 'Don't Play That Shit'. Really, you couldn't make it up.

(Insert joke about a Big Pooh and Big Floaty collabo being 'the shit' here.)

Day-Glo

2005-09-28T22:39:00.000+01:00

The only thing that could possibly make this picture better would be for it to have been snapped by Uncle Normski.

Game recognising game on so many different levels.

It's Bigger Than Hip-Hop

2005-09-25T23:39:00.000+01:00

The new Hip-Hop Karaoke London night will be on Thursday October 20th at The Social (new venue due to popular demand and all that).

Anyone turning up and performing 'Long Island Wildin'' while doing the Patti Dooke will get some sort of special prize you can't buy in record stores. Like a kitten.

G-G-G-G-Guess Who?

2005-09-25T23:17:00.000+01:00

Young Buck on G-Unit's southern takeover:

“I got a few big name artists from down south that I never thought I’d even be talking to never mind signing for G-Unit South. It’s like I’m in the projects looking at these dudes all over TV and listening to they shit in cars and then I’m talking to them on the phone.

“Who are they? It’s more than one and one of them is locked up at the moment. I’ll let you all think real hard about that...

"A few are at the end of their situations and I can provide what they’re looking for at G-Unit.”

Red Carpet Regal

2005-09-23T10:29:00.000+01:00

DSC01195
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

The rap Frankie Carson and the new Big Daddy Kane. Holler!

Let Is Snow

2005-09-22T14:18:00.000+01:00

Is Young Jeezy the new Busta?

The current cameo of choice is now giving Slim Thug a leg-up with the remix of 'Diamonds', hoping to make people still care about the Boss Hogg as Swishahouse get it on lock.

Jeezy himself is becoming more idosyncratic each time however, punctuating virtually every line on his P$C appearance with his crop of catchphrases (Yeeaah, Eeeey, and so on).

In fact Jeezy is so hot right now that the only way he could make himself more buzzworthy was to grab an appearance from Hov (thankfully dumping Fat Jidoe). Now with those two cropping up on another freestyle together, maybe
the young Snowman's grind is the real touchpaper for Jay-Z's re-ignition into the game?

On an unrelated note, Rapid Ric's great 'Getcha Weight Up' mix CD contains the current best rap title in Lil O's 'Curious Hos Peepin Flow'. It's like an 80s throwback with candypaint and misogyny.

He's From Mississippi Y'All

2005-09-18T00:02:00.000+01:00

Not quite as popular as the bible yet, David 'Jesus' Banner nevertheless went all acoustic at a recent N'Awlins benefit gig. Keep preaching the good book like this and we'll forget about those first six or so tracks on the new album, Lavell. And the rock one at the end. And that one with Kweli.

What Really Counts

2005-09-16T13:53:00.000+01:00

More a movement than even Cam and his dippy cronies up in Harlem, peep this: Mister Sandwich - it's C Dot Huxtable endorsed, you know.

"Yo, when you hear talk of the Southside, you hear talk of the Team/See niggas feared Prince and respected 'Preme..."

2005-09-13T00:31:00.000+01:00

The most trill paragraph in 50 Cent's 'From Pieces To Weight: Once Upon A Time In Southside Queens' book:

"I knew right then that Dillinger's days were numbered. But I still didn't expect Sylvia to kill him. She was real slick about it. She used his own green against him and let him do most of the work. All she did was fill up a bowl with roach spray so it looked like milk and placed the bowl on the floor. Of course, any normal dog would have some sense of self-preservation that would keep it from drinking a bowl of poison. Not Dillinger. He went right at it. I think that when he died, his only regreat was that he didn't get to finish his last meal."

(Note: All typos courtesy of Kris Ex.)

A Brief Review Of 'Hustle And Flow'

2005-09-13T00:15:00.000+01:00

Somewhere between an alleged Three 6 Mafia soundtrack and a heavy dose of John Singleton involvement, you’d be forgiven for expecting a decent, rap-savvy film to emerge. Yet after lounging through a Rolling Rock-assisted viewing of ‘Hustle And Flow’ you’re left wondering what exactly you were meant to be watching.

Set around a down and out pimp’s quest to switch from the ass game to the rap game – and featuring an extended cameo from Ludacris as a particularly odious rapper going by the title of Skinny Black (Generic Rap Name Term plus Generic Rap Name Term equalling rapper playing a la-de-dah-de-dah-de-doodle-doo-whop-de-doo rapper!) - the ‘funny’ bits have potential but are never quite taken to their logical punchlines: at one point a wife with a penchant for more rabbit than Sainsbury’s is in the middle of talking her husband through the minutia of her day in such a deliciously annoying voice that you’re expecting Clipse, ‘Lord Willin’’, track six intro to kick in but, well, it doesn’t.

Likewise, at one point D Jay is on the tipping point of being cast as a hen-pecked pimp but, well, nothing comes of it. Instead there’s a completely unnecessary scene where he kicks one of his special ladies out of the house (baby included), which might be just the kind of thing that struggling pimps do to relieve the tension but adds nothing to the plot development. (And again, there’s a scene where the nerdy white boy producer and the be-dreadlocked blonde white girl who gives white trash a good ol’ name look to be getting close to each other but then, well, nothing for the rest of the film.)

So you’re left with a motion picture that can’t decide whether it wants to be serious or funny, instead coming out like a stone-washed mix of the two.

What ‘Hustle & Flow’ was crying out for was to be given a warm touch – like in Cube’s ‘Friday’ – but instead it just largely bemuses and it’s not long before post-viewing talk is whittled down to, ‘What the hell was the song playing in the club with the girl singing over ‘Still Tippin’’?'

What A Relief

2005-09-10T19:12:00.000+01:00

Oh my god. Haven't the people of New Orleans suffered enough.

Mos Def has recorded a song called 'Katrina Clap'.

Yes, it's that beat.

Yes, it's terrible.

Now officially the only artsist making Nas seem acceptable.

Inappropriate Behaviour

2005-09-10T11:46:00.000+01:00

The worst thing you'll hear this week: Talib Kweli's flow on 'Ridin'. Despite the smooth laidback stylings of the beat, it's like he's rocking what he thinks is an archetypal southern flow, despite it being completely at odds with the actual beat. Clown.

"Been bangin' Screw since '92..."

2005-09-07T15:52:00.000+01:00

The highlight of the Paul Wall album? Grabbing a sample snippet from 'Get Crunk' is certainly hustle-manic.

Houson Keeps On Making 'Em...

2005-09-04T21:49:00.000+01:00

KIOTTI

Asylum’s assault on the established major labels gathers pace as they continue to trawl through those H-Town streets and scoop up the rap gems. Now get ready for Kiotti…

DO YOU FEEL ANY PRESSURE ON YOU BEING FROM HOUSTON?
“Well I’m part of the new movement in Houston with new faces and it’s great to be part of. I’m part of this new movement with people like Paul Wall, Mike Jones and Chamillionaire but I’m also bringing something different to it. We all represent Houston and at the moment we have a great chance to really represent for the region.”

YOU’VE WORKED WITH CHAMILLIONAIRE QUITE A LOT ALREADY. HOW DID THAT HOOK-UP COME ABOUT?
“With Cham, he’s someone who’s really on top of his game in the music scene. He’s been around even longer than me so when I was coming up he was someone who I wanted to reach out to. We got real cool and we’ve been working together for a minute now.”

THERE ARE RUMOURS YOU BATTLED LIL’ FLIP IN A FREESTYLE CONTEST A WHILE BACK…
“Ha ha. Well, what actually happened was that Lil’ Flip came out with a record and I came back with an answer record. The rest is history! This was around 2000, before he got his big deal, but it was great for me because it’s not often that a big name shoots a slug at someone much smaller. I think that after they heard me hold my own people started to really respect me. It really put my name on the map.”

WHO WON THE BATTLE?
“Ha, well in my opinion I won!”

YOU HAD A BIG REGIONAL HIT WITH ‘HOOKER HOOKER’ ABOUT A DANCE. WHAT DID IT INVOLVE DOING?
“Well the ‘Hooker Hooker’ was just crazy! It’s like if you image the top part of a person’s body going everywhere... I mean it was a real big song – one of the biggest independent releases of the last years in the south – and it was a radio song even though I’m not really about those radio hits.”

YOU’VE SIGNED WITH ASYLUM BUT THERE WAS TALK THAT A LOT OF OTHER MAJORS WERE TRYING TO SIGN YOU…
“It was Def Jam, Sony and Universal that came looking for me. I went with Asylum in the end. I met them and they seem to really be putting in the work and grinding. If you look at 106 & Park then you see that Asylum have four of the top ten videos at the moment, so they’re the hot label. I also have a group I’m coming out with called The Team, so it might end up being like a Young Jeezy/Boyz N The Hood situation.”

(Kiotti’s Asylum debut will drop in 2006; his ‘29th Street Hustlers’ mix-CD is out now.)

Still Fly

2005-09-02T04:15:00.000+01:00

Hip-Hop Karaoke London went down a treat last night. Full range of pics over at the website, but Old Boy lowlights included:

The Trick Daddy Shirt Part 2 (Part 1 coming soon)
(Note: Picture removed at poser's request.)

Yurple: The Movement

The Party Hat substituted for a pastel lime green shirt

Pick 'Em Up

2005-08-31T22:27:00.000+01:00

Last night, after hitting up a Sony Playstation sponsored break-dancing painting visual fiesta (no, us neither, but when you're in the area it's simply too rude to turn down gratis beer from Brasil), a dalliance into Tower Records to peruse their magazine selection saw a sighting of ?uestlove from The Roots snapping up a selection of 'Three For £20' CDs, including Definition Of Sound, Kanye (er, can't he just get 'em for free?) and our Lisa from Bolton. A frugal be-afroe'd man then.

Reggae Techno

2005-08-30T10:16:00.000+01:00

"Not too sure about this one..."

"Come on, it's 99 cents; that's like 60 pence plus there's 75% off it!"

"The press release stapled to the front of the record does look kinda interesting - from Atlanta, namechecks Quad City Deejays and 95 South as influences and assures that it's suitable for 'Heavy club play!' "

"1997 was a good year for that sort of bassy bounce music, trust me."

[Three days and one listen later.]

"You know that '1997 is a good year for that sort of bassy bounce music' record? It's bloody reggae techno. I shit you negative. Not even Hollertronix would play that."

"Oh."

Probably The Greatest Show In The World?

2005-08-29T21:45:00.000+01:00

Imagine an event like this: P 'Everything I do is with a certain level of class and sophistication' Diddy hosting and giving a Jacob watch away to a kid in the crowd, Grandmaster Flash spinning, Luke running on stage to drop 'I Wanna Rock' so the Diddymeister can dance to it, MC Hammer performing, and Jay-Z giving Diddy dirty looks for somewhat acting the fool.

Well, imagine no more as it was real and available to peruse on your TV. It's called the MTV VMA Awards and, say what you like about ol' Music Television, but it was top entertainment. And it all went down without any violence, too.*

Other than a scheduling oversight that saw it going out at the same time as vintage golfing bible Caddyshack (aka game truly recognising game) and the final of America's Top Model, it was top Sunday night televisual fare.

(* We jest.)

"I'm always spinning records in the back for the crew..."

2005-08-27T13:07:00.000+01:00

Gotta love Discorama (the music store of the new millennium and beyond, no less), where you can pick up hidden Mannie Fresh on the mic moments for about 20 pence. Cashback indeed.

Next Universe

2005-08-26T13:48:00.000+01:00

Coming soon from Old Boy Entertainment and Ayres & Eleven from The Rub: An exciting fusion of hip-hop, Scrabble, wrestling and donut car moves. It's scientifically proven to be a hit. Watch this space.

Flipped

2005-08-23T15:40:00.000+01:00

A. Fight and bicker over copies of Oowee's 'Why Cry' on the ever dope Asylum.

Q. What do Old Boys do after lunch at 7A in New York.

Purple Reign

2005-08-23T15:27:00.000+01:00

Killer Mike sounds hungry. Although his LP seems like it should be out already, we can’t say we’re not glad he’s getting a proper re-up on the Big Boi helmed Purple Ribbon label. For evidence check ‘The Killer Mixtape’ where Mike breaks it down pulling no punches about rapping actors and just shit that pisses him off in general.

‘General’ Patton’s own promo mixtape ‘Got That Purp’ is full of classic sounding material too, showing that Andre
getting his thesp on bothers him a lot less than it does Mike.

Props to DJ Drama and The Aphilliates for putting out the illest mixtapes right now! Good work, old boys.

Totally as an unrelated side note – G-Unit are officially the new Bad Boy now that Tony Yayo is rhyming to Britney’s ‘Toxic’. Sing along now (Puff style)… “We take hits from last year, yeah, yeah!”

Go South

2005-08-19T16:22:00.000+01:00

Good to hear Paul "I can still catch boppers if I drove a cab" Wall popping up on the new Kanye West album, opening with his usual suave parking lot pimping:

"Whut it dew, I’m posted up in the parking lot my trunk waving/The candy gloss is immaculate – it’s simply amazing..."

That lil' iced-out gringo then moves on to his Windex-shine:

"It’s a star studded event when I valet park/Open up my mouth and sunlight illuminates the dark/You see them fo's crawling/You see them screens falling/The disco ball in my mouth insinuates I’m ballin’..."

Then he rides it home, smooth like peanut butter without the crunch:

“A young Houston hard hitter/All about the scrilla/Riding something candy-coated/Crawling like a caterpillar/I’m tippin’ on them fo’s/I’m jamming on that Screw/I’m looking for the hoes/Baby, whut it dew/Drive slow homie…”

As for the album? It probably depends on your level of tolerance for Kanye's whiney voice/cornball lyric moments.

Hip-Hop Karaoke - The Movement

2005-08-19T14:39:00.000+01:00

Hip-Hop Karaoke London

Little Laughs

2005-08-18T13:33:00.000+01:00

phonte
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Phonte from Little Brother's joke of the moment:

Q. How do you get a blonde on the roof?

A. Tell her it’s drinks on the house.

The Chart Show

2005-08-17T14:58:00.000+01:00

Ten to tune in to...

1. Maseo 'Nextel Chirp'
2. Young Jeezy 'My Hood'
3. Bavu Blakes 'Too Selfish'
4. Ludacris feat. Field Mob 'Georgia'
5. Paul Wall feat. Tony Yayo 'Sittin' Sideways' (Remix)
6. Killer Mike 'Niggas Down South'
7. Chamillionaire feat. Lil' Flip 'Turn It Up'
8. Bun B 'Draped Up'
9. Masco 'Nextel Chirp' (Slowed)
10. Young Jeezy feat. Jay-Z 'Go Crazy' (Remix)

Do The Math

2005-08-17T14:55:00.000+01:00

In the whip friendly world of South Beach, Miami, there is a social orthodoxy taking place. The most recent traffic survey concluded that 70% of sound systems prefer Young Jeezy (100% in the case of the high proliferation of Hummers). It's almost like individuality = sucker. Whereas Jeezy = love. Only reggaeton is competing.

Is it just a slow summer? Is this just a southern phenomeneon? Is Jeezy just that hot?

We need to know.

"Don't text message me..."

2005-08-14T18:37:00.000+01:00

While the UK slowly attempts to loosen the vice like grip of Crazy Frog doing Russ Abott's 'Atmosphere' or whatever, Atlanta is succumbing to something perhaps more beguiling even than Jeezy and Webbie's neatly-packagaed nihilism.

Maseo's 'Nextel Chirp' is one of those unfathomably catchy records that burns itself into your brain upon one listen. A situation not helped whilst in ATL where the actual Nextel 'chirp' is in constant earshot.

Don't even try to gauge the merits of this one. Just bounce.

Too Selfish

2005-08-10T16:17:00.000+01:00

Fresh from signing to a label we’re not sure we can most definitely reveal yet, Bavu Blakes hit up Manhattan’s hipster set the other night with a 20 minute PA that saw him walking through the bar freestyling at will. Mighty impressive.

Peep his Texan take on hip-hop here then hit up his website for more.

Staying Fly

2005-08-08T22:12:00.000+01:00

Three 6 Mafia 'Stay Fly' Video

On some Bruce Lee, 'Natural un-naturalness' type speed, Juicy J, Crunchy Black and DJ Paul host as Gorilla Unit's Youngest Buck and southern rap bods 8-Ball and MJG guest with an incredibly catchy ditty. It's first track to be lifted from their next full length outing, 'The Known Unknowns' and, on the video tip, springs into action with some Miami Vice opening credits type visuals, an emphatic 'Yeah!' and then some Ocean's Eleven style sweeping sandy coastline camera sways. Fortunately, the soundtrack comes from 3-6 Mafia not Lil' Jan Hammer.

From here we sweep from the chopper shots to a hotel where we discover that young Juicy has decided to trade his silky white sheets and some attractive young ladies for matter altogether more pressing; namely, he's forgot to put his dentures in. Then, ah, what the hell, just download it and watch it all unfold (wet bathroom hand towels, OAPs on a Saga holiday and all).

Verbally, the wonderfully entertaining yet worrying highlight is the snippet;

"DJ Paul is a dog, one you do not cuss,
You leave your green around me,
Your green gonna get lit up,
You leave your drink around me,
Believe your drank gonna get drunk up,
You leave your girl around me,
And she bet she gonna get stuffed."

Hide the Benylin next time Walnuts is round for supper then.

Organised Rhyme

2005-07-31T13:29:00.000+01:00

original
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

An original Old Boy sighted at the Oxford Regatta, courtesy of Croydon hip-hop historian Stu Egan. (Jeff Chang fall back!)

New Slang (Part Two)

2005-07-29T09:35:00.000+01:00

hoodmania
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Coming soon from Old Boy Entertainment: Hood Mania the movement.

Can't Nobody Hold Us Down...

2005-07-22T01:12:00.000+01:00

Despite the bombings in London and despite the fact that Hip-Hop Karaoke London was well on the way to being the most jinxed night ever (who else has two terrosist attacks scuppering their jump off club night?), the inaugural Hip-Hop Karaoke London night went off with much style. Pictures coming soon.

What's My Motherfucking Name?

2005-07-18T14:34:00.000+01:00

If I had to use three words to describe the meaning of the name Chamillionaire then I'd go with 'rich in style'.

"Some people will notice the 'millionaire' in my name first and some people will notice the 'chamillion part' first. I am a very versatile artist that raps slow, fast, and can sing his own hooks, but most of my fans will say that I'm one of the more lyrical rappers in the south.

"The name breaks down to be Cham-ill-on-air which means that when you hear me rap you will think it’s sick even without a beat.

"When I was in a group I was also acting as the manager and not just the artist so sometimes people would look at me like the bad guy because I was the one
they had to negotiate with. I started introducing myself under a bad guy alias [King Koopa] to people because I knew they were gonna look at me like the bad guy anyways.”

Say hi to the bad guy's music here.

The Pre-Jig Jig

2005-07-14T12:29:00.000+01:00

Old Boys hit up the pre-jig jig preview of the Born In The Bronx exhibition last night, getting their free champagne, voulevents and Cate Blanchard on (although Cakeboy forgot to bring the party hat).

Damn, we're turning into the 3am boys - it's got to stop.

Cowboy boots with the Nike swoosh on the side

2005-07-13T14:40:00.000+01:00

The new issue of Hip-Hop Connection magazine includes a huge (and definitive) Houston hip-hop history lesson from the bod behind houstonsoreal, along with Old Boy musings on Mr 281... ah fuck the rest, y'all know it.

Turn It Up

2005-07-09T20:55:00.000+01:00

Boom! Blam! Explode! World exclusive! Etc! That’s what we’d likely be saying were we a radio show having just been vested with this new Chamillionaire track. Lil’ Flip guests and Scott Storch is behind the boards. Now pay attention boys and girls and watch the H-Town boy blow.

"For the first time it's going down - history baby! Croydonia what's up?"

2005-07-09T19:37:00.000+01:00

Crime Mobb. The Hives. Knuck if you motherfucking buck.

(Butchering and mixing courtesy of J 'Prince' Plates. Fall back you trendy kids - there's a new mash-master in town.)

Dipped In Diamond Fondue

2005-07-09T19:30:00.000+01:00

SLIM THUG
‘ALREADY PLATINUM’
(GEFFEN/STAR TRAK)
4/5

The clamour to sign southern - and particularly Houston - rappers has been fuelling the rap rumour mill for the best part of the last couple of years (see Jigga in XXL stoking the fire further), with those missing the boat cursing every time they hear ‘Still Tippin’’ drip from the radio. Pharrell though is a smart man, getting in at ground level with the acquisition of the Slim Thugga franchise.

However, after teasing us with a couple of incredible singles, an LP was suddenly leaked to the net without promotional fanfare and the opportunity seemed missed. Whilst that release was as tight as anything you’d expect from the Neptunes camp, it was just that: ‘from the Neptunes’. Now on the official re-up, Slim Thug gets the soundtrack he deserves. The grooves are more intense throughout and slowed music gets its first Star Trak feature on ‘Diamonds’ and anyone concerned about the omission of many of the original cuts will instantly suffer memory loss upon hearing ‘Boyz N Blue’ and ‘Already Platinum’. The latter features an inspired Pharrell getting into character talking about his wrist “dipped in diamond fondue” meanwhile producing Slim Thug’s baritone to even more menacing effect.

Getting his Biggie on proves a natural move too for Slim Thug with ‘Ashy To Classy’ while the obligatory sensitivity is done almost MC Shan style on the 80s infused ‘Miss Mary’. Club concessions are a pre-requisite of a Star Trak deal of course, but again these are done with style and no little assistance from rap’s most underrated, Pusha T, on ‘Click Clack’.

The unavoidable boast in the LP’s title was always more of an allusion to Slim’s previously self-managed sales, but could easily be a risk that contributes to a career millstone. However, in its final form ‘Already Platinum’ is a calculated risk at worst.

Maybe I'll Do It For Charity

2005-07-04T23:09:00.000+01:00

Despite missing the event due to being busy sorting out the logistics of Thursday's Hip-Hop Karaoke, Old Boys somehow hit up the official Live8 after-party at some swanky club on Saturday. Amongst gratis beer dranking and sushi sampling, Cakeboy, complete with famed party hat, was seen doing what's been described as "a mentalist farmer's hoe down" to Missy, Rob Damn popped-up his collar and debated some sort of Joss Stone versus Dido conundrum, while Lil' Phlip was last peeped loungin' on a plush sofa rocking sandals and shorts.

Big shout to Hymania for the red carpet hook-up.

Dusk Before Fireworks

2005-06-29T22:58:00.000+01:00

Each day the waking sun brings around another new Slim Thug verse.

Each day as the morning breeze sets out on its errands, old boys across the land (or, at least, in the holy concrete land of Croydonia) pray to the good Lord up above that someone will actually release Slim Thug’s album.

Each day as the sun wanes the disappointment gets slightly easier to deal with.

Liquor helps.

(Disclaimer: Hey, come on, have you seen some of the other crap people post on music blogs? We can get away with this sort of whimsy at the very least!)

Proving that Polack servant-girls have their feelings, too...

2005-06-29T22:35:00.000+01:00

Between bringing up Beatnuts and Grand Puba remix memories and the line “Old school wanna do the Kid-N-Play to it…”, Nappy Roots' 'Rewind' is quite the ticket.

The less said about David ‘Jesus’ Banner’s still-awful-no-matter-how-many-just-one-last-second-chances-you-give-it ‘Play’ the better. Get back to saving the kids, Lavell. Please.

Chamillionaire’s Truth

2005-06-27T23:02:00.000+01:00

Cham’s cadence can come over as slightly brittle and off kilter until you’re accustomed to it, but here he flows fluidly to the fullest. (Gunshots courtesy of Whoo Kid. Applause from the forward-thinking rap minority.)

Forget the usual next-to-blow suspects and hype riders – this kid’s talent eclipses them all with such ease. He's Bun B certified too.

Ring Ring Ring (Ha Ha Hey)

2005-06-22T09:18:00.000+01:00

The hot ringtone ethic right about now is obviously mixtape ringtones. Customise your phone with an MP3 straight from the latest streetsweeper, complete with shouting, shout outs and general ruckus. These are the latest Goose-approved selections that will have all in the vicinity getting buck when your mum calls to see what time you want picking up from the station:

Kay Slay ‘NYC Drama’ Track 16 – ‘Rollin’ by John Doe, Timbaland and Lil Jon
“New York drama motherfuckers!”

DJ Whoo Kid ‘Hell Up In Hollywood’ Track 8 – ‘We Stay High’ – Young Buck, 3 6 Mafia and 8Ball and MJG
“For the first time it's going down – history baby! Samuel L Jackson what's up?”

Rapid Ric and Mr Rogers ‘After Da Relays 2K5’ Track 14 – ‘Lil O Speaks’ – Lil O and Bun B
“Fuck being polite we finna go upside a hater head in this bitch!”

DJ Envy ‘Purple Codeine 2’ Track 23 - ‘BG Interlude’ – BG
“You already know how we got it rockin' like a cut off stocking!”

DJ Kool Kid and Paul Wall ‘Sittin Sidewayz’ Track 19 – ‘From The South’ – Z-Ro, Paul Wall, Lil Flip
“Come on man it’s a fucking movement!”

A Pleasant Surprise...

2005-06-13T18:56:00.000+01:00

Young Jeezy

A fine Jersey cow (not related)

We're not going to lie. We weren't sweating the Young Jeezy LP. But dammit, ‘Thug Motivation: 101’ is on constant rotisserie around these parts!

It’s a guarantee for those missing that Atlanta swagger, coming off like a simplistic version of ‘Trap Musik’ whilst T.I. gets his re-up on. In fact, it even has its own ‘Rubberband Man’ in the form of ‘My Hood’.

Jeezy is going to surprise a few people with this LP, if not with the lyrical content where he unapologetically sticks to the script. The beats, however, all bump hard, with some cuts like ‘Dope Boy’s’ taking it into 9th Wonder territory – and it works. Even Mannie pops up lending his support.

Gotta say too, that whole breathless rap style that Jigga perfected - and Lil Wayne loves so much - is catching on…

The Listening Post (Sorry...)

2005-06-10T18:40:00.000+01:00

David Banner 'Push'
The idea of Big Banner the Backbeater as a ladies man is something you don't really want to think about too much... The Ying Yang Twins remix surely beckons.

Fresh 'Hey Cake Boy' (Instrumental)
Sounding smooth for summer without those "hitting like Mike Tyson" verbals.

Webbie feat. Bun B 'Give Me That' (Clean)
One of those strange songs that sound better in their cleaned up and edited format, this cocks an ear to 'I got 5 On It' and then takes it way down south.

And then screwed for the summer.

Gucci Mane '$1 Million Man'
The man of the moment for all the wrong reasons.

Killer Mike feat. Big Boi 'My Chrome'
'Still Tippin''s quite obviously the anthem, but this is in the running for song of the year so far. Columbia will probably mess up the album by letting Nas chose all the tracks for Michael to rap over or something though.

And more Mike, DJ Paul and pals for the thugs.

Home & Away

2005-06-04T17:09:00.000+01:00

New Bay Area shit: Front Line's E-A-Ski produced 'Bang It'. Now bounce.

Boss Hawg Outlaw

2005-06-01T22:57:00.000+01:00

The Motherfucking Boss
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Spotted on a carnvial ride at the Minnesota State Fair (there are Old Boys ey'where): Tom 'The Don' Selleck rocking a moustache that's straight Florida retirement style and a dapper blue cap (the 'D' stands for dangerous, as if you didn't know).

Consider the bar for spraycan art raised.

Never Sea-Sick

2005-06-01T16:38:00.000+01:00

Bone Crusher. 'Gilligan's Island' remix.
Only sport open-toed sandals if you're Old Boy down.

(Kiotti & Chamillionaire MP3 finally up as well - scroll down a bit to grab it.)

The Chart Show

2005-06-01T13:13:00.000+01:00

1. Gucci Mane 'That's My Hood'
Feels so hood - and with a tempo to take you back to the Jodeci ballad days...

2. Pitbull 'Crank Up The Dank'
A great look for PitBeezy, as he's known in the Goose*.

3. Grit Boys feat. Paul Wall 'Drank In Your System'
One more fix of the people's champ.

4. Killer Mike 'My Chrome'
Still!

5. Young Jeezy 'Stay Strapped'
Modern beef cooks so damn quickly these days! We await the Gucci Mane response without baited breath.

(Goose = Public house more real than even Barry Proudfoot's The Wheatsheaf.)

We Got The Good Shit!

2005-05-31T17:57:00.000+01:00

Or, MP3s, to be precise. Music's now been added to the last David 'Jesus' Banner, Beezel, Mike Jones and Paul Wall entries. And the world's hardest freestyling, Pitbull, drops this on Rich Boy's soon-to-be classic 12": 'Get To Poppin' Freestyle

Another Day, Another Cover Version

2005-05-31T17:38:00.000+01:00

whoomp_there_it_was
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Tony ‘Baldrick’ Robinson and the Time Team ‘digging in the (Anglo Saxon) crates’ crew are about to release their debut single, ‘Whoomp! There it was’.

Covering Tag Team’s huge Miami bass fuelled hit ‘Whoomp! There It Is’from the early 90s, this picture shows proof it is actually going to happen.

(Note: This probably reads better whilst tipsy.)

New Slang

2005-05-27T21:03:00.000+01:00

Dip Set? E-Fonzarelli? 8Ball and his mate? Nah mane, the real slang was dropped by old boys like 'Big' Russell Maloney in the 1940s, speaking - and writing - real words.

The New Yorker wins again.

Now toast to that, Captain Jerk.

Coming soon: The first appearance of 'no homo' in Punch circa 1936.

"Computer - only time you've seen a Mac..."

2005-05-26T18:23:00.000+01:00

New Asylum signing Kiotti has just dropped a dope-out-the-park track with Chamillionaire which may or may not be called 'My Nerves'. MP3 here.

Next up: Pay attention boys and girls and watch Chamillionaire blow.

Old Boy Plea

2005-05-25T12:00:00.000+01:00

DB
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Here at Old Boy Entertainment we find it impossible to sit back and watch whilst the world misunderstands our good friend David ‘Jesus’ Banner*. This man cannot be so cruelly ignored by the general public any longer+. Please don’t let him drift in undeserved obscurity, becoming simply another deity to be appreciated through rose tinted spectacles years after his death.

Lavell Crump is the friend that you just don’t know you have yet. Kind of like a big aggressive dog that keeps away the haters, yet soothes you in your darkest hour. However, on the eve of the most crucial release of his career, Banner needs your love.

True, he may not have the charming comic book characteristics of his friend Ludicrous Christopher, or the copyrighted ‘Yeeeeah’ of his friend Lil Jonathan Smith, but he gets close on both counts. Especially if someone takes it upon himself to build a hilarious Dave Chapelle style sketch around that low semi-barking grunt he does. (We just pray that Lenny Henry is reading this. You know, open him up to the European market.)

David Banner is the blue-collar champ with white-collar woes, you see. Who else could see ‘Fire Falling From The Sky’ as Bush is re-elected whilst still throwing ‘bows like the future of mankind depended on it? Who else did Steve Rifkind put at the heart of his re-up game ten years after Wu-Tang had made him famous? Who in fact is modern hip-hop’s everyman with a ‘movement’ that is all him, and only him? Banner.

Wistfully remembering where you were upon first hearing ‘Cadillac On 22s’ is an Old Boy’s favourite pastime, almost on a par with ordering that damn tasty Burger Meal Deal. However, does this help Banner in his quest for deserved world domination? No. Instead, we must embrace ‘Certified’ like a long lost relative and ignore those flashy releases from Snoop and the like with their ‘three hits maketh an album’ routine. We want the meat from Banner’s BBQ drenched in that political hot sauce (did you see the rugby?) and to share his southern struggle. In short we want you to rep to the death.

So, after three,

“M-I-crooked letter-crooked letter-I/Crooked letter-crooked letter-I/Hump your back, hump your back, I!”

(* Coming soon: Chuck D’s Top Ten Pieces Of Evidence That David Banner Is Jesus!)

(+ Aside: At one point OBE actually considered promoting ‘Mississippi: The Album’ on their own in the UK – Banner would have appreciated the love.)

Post Script

Oh yeah… and for further convincing and a preview of the '05 Laurel & Hardy, check out the physical comedy from Banner and Magic in the just released video for ‘Ain’t Got Nothing’. Even the appearance of Lil Boosie can’t take away from the fact that Banner is clearly trying to resurrect Eric Sykes’ ladder gag.

Video here. (Link courtesy of the good folks over at allhiphop.com)

Get buck here: 'Gangsta Walk (Certified Cake Combo Chiffonade Edit)'

You Don't Grind, You Don't Shine

2005-05-19T12:11:00.000+01:00

heresthenumberyoucanhitmeon
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

How many times is the chopped and screwed version of the Mike Jones album better than the original?

A million ga-zillion fa-fillion, that's how many.

Check it: 'Know What I'm Sayin''

Mmmm... Crossed Wires

2005-05-17T20:52:00.000+01:00

Old Boy Entertainment: “Do you ever cook food?”

Mike Jones: “Cook what?”

OBE: “Food.”

MJ: “What?”

OBE: “Do you ever cook food, like in the kitchen?”

MJ: “What do you mean?”

OBE: “Do you ever cook? Do you have any recipes for food you could give us?”

MJ: "What? What do you mean?"

OBE: "Do you have any recipes for food to cook you can tell us?"

MJ: “Nah, I don’t do that.”

OBE: “Okay.”

(Disclaimer: Sarabeth's, on Manhattan's Upper West Side, cook some quite glorious food and have recipes for days. Hit them up on 212-496-6280 and tell them Mike Jones sent you.)

Roll Deep

2005-05-17T10:19:00.000+01:00

Quentin's On His Way
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

Last Saturday Quentin T joined the Old Boys down at The Goose. We had no idea that the Pulp Fiction bod was such a South Park Mexican fan.

Rapic Ric

2005-05-16T19:39:00.000+01:00

Rapic Ric's three Texas tracks to check for:

“My favourite track right now is the new Z-Ro song which features Paul Wall and Lil’ Flip and is called ‘From The South’. They actually sample DJ Screw’s voice saying “From the south/I got the diamonds in my mouth.” It’s such a beautiful song.

"Then there’s a Chamillionaire song he did with Killer Mike and Pastor Troy and it’s just amazing.

"And there’s an artist from Austin named Bavu Blakes with a song called ‘Too Selfish’ which brings more of the eclectic side to Texas hip-hop home. A lot of people just think we’re rapping about conspicuous consumption all the time but he’s bringing a lot more of the soulful side to things, like Common.”

(Full Rapid Ric interview coming in the next issue of Hip-Hop Connection.)

“You don’t have to go home…”

2005-05-16T19:22:00.000+01:00

‘My Chrome’ - another new vital Killer Mike promo. Mr DJ blends up just the right amount of 80s synth sounds into the mix (think: a less bastardised take on Banner and Flippa’s ‘’Bout Our Money’ which for some reason drums up images of, er, The Clothes Show) while Michael and Big Boi tell ladies that they can fix their make-up in the chrome of their whip. Classy and time efficient.

The opening lines are just so right: “Easy, that good shit got me sleepy/Rolling down ‘85/Leaning but I ain’t weaving/Man you should stay a day in the A/A parade of them Chevrolets…” And on it goes, each word stretched out to some sort of stylish slur.

Southern Special

2005-05-09T22:14:00.000+01:00

Front cover
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

The new issue of Hip-Hop Connection magazine is full-to-overflowing with Old Boy Entertainment penned southern goodness. Along with the obligatory Lil Jon and Ludacris interviews (the latter compared to a Premiership footballer thanks to his cliche-cum-circular-logic style answers to questions), science is dropped on David 'Jesus' Banner's back catalogue, Pitbull talks about his Miami mentor Mr Campbell, Fresh gets a two page spread to vent at Bone Crusher, BG talks about why he hates bling, the Euro-crunk invasion is profiled, dollar bin down south gems are named, why Cash Money Records are better than Rawkus is explained, Rapid Ric talks about, well, whatever disco jocks talk about, Mike Jones's phone number buffoonery is commented on and, um, there's probably some other stuff we've likely forgotten. Oh, plus a free TVT CD attached to the front, which is certainly the first time that Bun B's rhymed words have been given away free with a UK magazine.

Also, outside the direct OBE camp, Doyen D and Dee Rock run through Rap-A-Lot's history, those top chaps over at governmentnames revise their top ten grills feature, T Rey takes pictures of Cee-Lo's belly while drunk in London, and Matt Sonzala of houstonsoreal fame drops a Screwston perspective on the boy Dizzee Rascal. (Who, admittedly, isn't southern, but has made moves with the Grit Boys, so that'll more than do.)

Cop it. It's trill.

In Search Of Beezel

2005-05-09T21:55:00.000+01:00

Beezel was/is/might still be the most fantastic new southern rapper for decades. Rivalled only by perhaps Fresh when it comes to popularity in Croydon, he dropped the resolutely old-to-the-new sounding 'See About Ya' (with a lil' help from D Banner and B Crusher) on Def Jam South, leaked the two outstanding tracks 'Luggage' (with Juvenile) and 'Giant', and then promptly disappeared. Why? No idea. Being signed to a company who thought it was a good idea to put money behind Keith Murray might be one explanation (ou est Comp, too?), or it might have been Juve's actual-sexual-harassment-on-wax blurb on 'Luggage' ("That's too much I need to check your pass, ma/You ain't got no weapons or nuthin' by that ass, ha?/Call security for a random search/The girl's not regulation - examine her skirt...")

Whatever. If Old Boy Entertainment had a proper record label we'd sign Beezel in a minute. He's the truth.

Words Of Wisdom: 'Giant'

Even Chick Magnets Need To Check The Mirror

2005-05-09T21:53:00.000+01:00

Paulwall.jpg_1
Originally uploaded by oldboyentertainment.

"I've just been in the studio with Cam'Ron. He has a new Lamborghini. It's blue. It's off the hook..."

Swishahouse and Dip Set = game over.

In the meanwhile: 'Sittin' Sideways

Darned Expensive Sandwiches

2005-05-09T21:34:00.000+01:00

The scene: The Koch offices in New York, a place so dour and depressing that Prozac is probably given out to workers during tea breaks.

The premise: Interviewing B Gizzle about, well, everything except his records on Koch.

The problem: Half way through the interview a female office worker knocks on the door and informs BG that he has to move to a new room. Why? They need to store some conference sandwiches in the room he's presently holding court in. You couldn't make it up.

Bizarre aside: Grandmaster Caz phones up during the interivew (the photographer goes deep in the game), speaks to BG and plans are made to collaborate.

Euro-Screw

2005-05-01T15:42:00.000+01:00

Slow Motion

Houston may be 2005’s hottest underground hip-hop spot, and, internal bickering aside, the Swisha House camp may be holding down the cutting-edge side of rap production, but the chopped and screwed phenomenon continues to make waves far beyond its Screwston home ranch with Big Dada’s French frontline being the latest to take it down a notch, courtesy of a deejay from Geneva called DJ Raze...

HOW DID YOU END UP GETTING THE JOB OF SCREWING THE TTC ALBUM?

“Actually, it was a request from my man Tekilatex of TTC. We both love chopped and screwed music and he was feeling my ‘The Screwed Up Remixes’ mixtape series.”

WHAT OTHER CHOPPED AND SCREWED PROJECTS HAD YOU WORKED ON BEFORE?

“I made my first chopped and screwed mixtape over two ears ago and a new one this past summer, along with a best of DJ Screw compilation for the anniversary of his passing. This was my first time screwing a full album though.”

HOW DID YOU APPROACH THE PROJECT THEN?

“This one was a challenge for me ‘cos it’s not the usual type of stuff you chop and screw. It deals with different kinds of vibes from the synthetic dirty south sound to Miami bass stuff and some pop rock craziness. I have to take some time to find the right vibe for each track and also get creative with the project - you know, add blends, scratches, interludes and stuff to make it become a whole new experience. And I re-arranged each track separately – I didn’t screw the whole thing all at once.”

HOW DID YOU DEAL WITH THE TRACK ‘CODEINE’ (WHICH IS ALREADY DESIGNED TO BE PLAYED AT DIFFERENT SPEEDS)?!

“Yeah, that song’s funny! I had already used the screwed version of it for a mixtape (the version you hear when you play the song at 33rpm on the 12” release). For the screwed TTC album then I slowed it down a little more and added some chops.”

HOW POPULAR IS CHOPPED AND SCREWED MUSIC IN EUROPE THEN?

“I think here it’s kind of a whole new thing but it’s getting known and appreciated more. I know some cats in Geneva that have been into it since like 1996! Back then I wasn’t taking that whole style seriously but years later I realised how deep that shit is. Some people don’t like it at all and believe you have to be under the influence to feel it but that’s not really the case. You just have to listen closely.”